In the media we keep hearing two messages that appear to be polar opposites. Give freely to others without expecting anything in return...but also don't over give and take care of yourself. The question then is, how do I give to others, take care of myself and not be selfish? The simplest way to solve this is identify what service, or solution you want to provide to others. Then stop before you take action and ask yourself what you truly need in order to provide this service. This may signal to you that you have responsibilities to yourself first that must be taken care of so you can serve others. If you feel resentful or burnt out after helping others its a good sign you're not taking care of your needs first.
The second part of this is to stop treating others as children! Treat other adults as just that, adults. Remember that as an adult we are responsible for ourselves and our lives. No one else is responsible for the care of our health, mental and emotional states, finances, time or commitments. Take some time this week and see where you are being a parent to others by taking on their responsibilities and also where you are being childish and hoping someone else will relieve you of your responsibilities. This may look like something you don't want to make a decision about, because then you'd have to be responsible and take action on it.
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